i really have the urge to run. just run. anywhere. just not here. i can't stand it. for sixteen years or less. i've always tolerate. from both of you. dad. and mom. dad, you said you have a limit. so do i. i don't only have to take it from you. also from mom. i know you too have to take it from the three of us. but guess what? i'm only and already sixteen. i can't always be your baby. and i don't know alot of things. i'm not always sixteen. just one more month i'm seventeen. i'm growing up. not shrinking down. i'm not becoming a baby. i'm becoming a person. a grown person that knows how to think for herself. and other people. i learnt from my many past mistakes. why can't you learn to let us go? then at least we won't suffer so much when you're gone. why must you be so selfish?
i try to look. from the other way. many times from another angle. but i just can't stand it. i'm sick of being here and suck it all up while i smile everyday outside. still knowing you love me deep down. i'm sick of sucking up everything and pretend it's okay. i do love you in my life. just sometimes you make me hate. i don't want to. but you made me. please let me go. i hate you guys for being so nice in my life. i wanna run. and never look back anymore. just run as far as i go. while i meet god on the other end.

would you bring me in to stay with you? thanks, i know you would. heaven is the best place that'll never exist on earth. god i love you.